I'm scared right now.
There, I said it.
They say admitting there's an issue is the first step to recovery, so here goes everything. This last year has been a rollercoaster of highs and lows, but I've had a low key baller year. By no means did everything turn out as expected, but when you step back 10,000 feet, there were way more ups than downs.
However, I'm kinda shaking in my vans.
What do I love? Scary movies. Why? Because I love being scared. I love the uncertainty of outcome, the stage settings of music and lighting and eerie details, and the back-against-the-wall moments when the protagonist realizes it's now or never, and truly has nothing to lose.
While I may not be sneaking around in a dimly lit house I probably shouldn't have been wondering through in the first place, I, moving into 2017, am terrified.
It feels as if this year is my now-or-never, nothing-to-lose moment. I've surrounded myself with quite possibly some of the most supportive and inspiring clients, friends that would take a bullet (hopefully never literally), and family that, lo and behold, do sometimes know you better than anyone else - and I'm so thankful, grateful, and appreciative.
The music is queued and the stage is set for the face-to-face confrontation with the unknown happenings of the new year. And just like the horror film protagonist who appears to the viewer to be unstoppable, I'm am fairly certain, on the inside there is a little voice saying "I'm so scared right now...you've got this...just breathe...3, 2, 1, GO!"
I'm so scared right now.
You've got this.
3, 2, 1...